A little of this and a little of that

First off, I want to say thanks to those of you who responded to my last post for your encouragement and support. I decided to sit down with the current ED and let him know that I am thinking of applying for the position and I asked what the possibility was of doing it part time. He said he needed to talk to the board of directors about that, but he also needed to speak to them because one of the former candidates who had been offered the position had called back to say that her circumstances had changed and that she was interested again. Since this offer was made before this ED came on board, he wants to make sure there were no conditions put on the offer (i.e., that she had a certain number of months within which to make the decision, etc.) He did say though, that from her resume, the candidate looks good but not necessarily "ideal". So, he is supposed to let me know the outcome of his chat with the board. That's OK, since it gives me more time to think!

Well, the propectus defense is not going to happen in two weeks like I had hoped. My advisor sat down with the committee members and they still want some changes to be made. I worked my ass off on that thing and it's still not good enough!! I'm going to sit down with my advisor next week and find out exactly what this entails. I'm telling you, when I got that email, I started imaging what my life would be like if I just put school on hold for now, and it sounded GOOD!! And although I had one day where I seriously considered quitting, I'm back to my senses already and there's no way I'm giving up!

I got an awesome workout in today, the best I've had in two weeks! It was an UBWO along with 20 minutes of HIIT where I burned 311 calories! I think that run allowed me to let some steam out from the stress of this week, and damn it felt good! Over the past two weeks, I haven't been able to get in as many workouts as usual and I was starting to feel it. But now I'm back with a vengeance!

My dilemma

As you all know, the agency where I work has gone through mega changes over the past 8 or so months. People got laid off, we've been through a couple of new executive directors, and three of our programs had to close down. We also lost our director of clinical services who I really looked up to and admired. Actually, the title of that position has now been changed to "supervisor" of clinical services. Interviews were done a few months ago, and a couple of potential candidates were found, but it didn't work out because for whatever reason, they were not able to move from out of province when they were offered the position.

So, here's where my dilemma comes in. A couple of weeks ago, one of my friends from work came up to me and told me that there is a buzz around the agency that people want ME to apply to be supervisor of clinical services! In fact, she had heard that before our last executive director left, she was trying to put a bug in my ear about this. Now I understand why the ED asked me twice within the span of a month if I would consider working full time, or at least 4 days a week! When my friend told me all this, it got me thinking about whether I should apply. Thing is, I would be crazy to take on a full time job while I still have school to finish up. So, I went to talk to the HR supervisor and asked her if she thought they would consider hiring me if I agreed to do 4 days a week. First off, she confirmed everything that my friend had told me and she said that the former ED thought that my qualifications were even better than those of the two candidates who had interviews and who were offered the position. Second, the HR supervisor said that if I would be willing to do 4 days a week, she would strongly back me with the current ED.

There are so many pros and cons to this position that it's making my head spin when I try to figure out if I should go for it or not. I'm going to list them and if you guys have any feedback, please let me know 'cause my brain is tired!

PROS:

- this would be a great career move for me
- I know the agency, and I have worked with the types of kids we serve for almost 4 years
- I would get a raise of about $10,000
-I like most of my coworkers and I think they would respect me as a supervisor

CONS:

- I think of the former Director of clinical services and the level of knowledge and expertise she had (she was a clinical psychologist) and I don't think I measure up to that yet. I will one day with more experience, but I don't think I'm there yet
- it would be weird supervising people who have been my colleagues up until now and some of whom have worked there longer than I have
- what if this takes away from some of the time I need for school?
- I just feel like I have so much left to learn, even though so many people from work tell me I would be great in this position.

In other news, I have yet to get a good workout in this week because I was in more training on Monday and Tuesday (this time I didn't have to go out of town). I'm going to try to change that tomorrow and get at least a good run in since I probably won't be able to get to the gym on the weekend. One of Scot's uncles passed away this week, so we will be going to his funeral on Saturday and doing family things.

Today was Kyle's last day of school, so I'm planning out different activities to keep him busy over the Summer. I think I will let him invite some friends over for playdates once or twice a week and then other days, get him out to the park or running around outside in some way. We'll probably also go to the museums and other fun stuff like that. I just want to make sure he doesn't get bored and that he doesn't watch too much tv or play too many video games or anything like that.

Hope everyone is doing well! I have been keeping up with all of your blogs even if I haven't always had time to comment. And YAY for Summer finally being here!

Back from Training

This past week was kind of fun since I got to go out of town on Thursday and Friday on a training for work. It was an all expenses paid trip and me and one of my coworkers got to stay at the Sheraton Hotel which is always nice. I always love staying at hotels (gotta love those high thread-count comfy bedsheets!) and I actually remembered to bring my workout gear, so I got a good run and UBWO in at the hotel's gym.

The training was on harm reduction which is the lingo we use in the addictions field to mean helping someone who is not ready to become abstinent from drug use to at least reduce their use, or engage in less risky drug use. Unfortunately, the reality is that many of the youths we work with are not willing to give up drug/alcohol use altogether, but they want to make changes to their use so that it does not cause them as many problems in their lives. So, if a youth was using 5+ grams of marijuana a week and they are able to cut that down to 1-2 grams per week, that is the start of some progress.

Here in Ottawa, we have needle exchange programs for heroin users, and distribution of crack pipes for crack-cocaine users and those too are forms of harm reduction since it has been found that cities with these programs in place substantially reduce their rates of HIV and hepatitis C infections. It's contraversial stuff though, and many people are pretty leery of such programs. I know my inital reaction was that we were just making it easier for drug users to use, but the more I work with teen users, the more I've come to realize that if people want to use, they are going to find a way to do it, and if clean, safe equipment is not available, they will find anything they can get their hands on that will help them get that high. One of the presenters was a psychiatrist who actually sets up information booths at raves and who has had a lot of success in helping teens think twice about their use. He brings an ecstasy testing kit with him and people can bring their pills over to test what is actually in them. Okay, I am getting off of my soap box, promise!

When I got home, I noticed that one of Kyle's eyes was red and I had the feeling he had pinkeye. Sure enough, when he woke up this morning, his eye was glued shut and I took him to the clinic where the doc said he had an infection. We have to give him drops 3 times a day for 7 days. I am soooo squeamish when it comes to eye things, so I'll be glad when this is done. I absolutely cannot watch eye operations on tv, and I don't think I could ever wear contact lenses or have laser surgery without hyperventilating! Luckily, my eyesight is good and I have not had to deal with these issues!

Okay, now it's time to go and catch up with all of you guys. Emily is napping and Kyle is at a b-day party (with a patch on so that he does not infect anyone!) so I actually have a few minutes to read blogs. Yay!

Mommy, get me out of here NOW!

If Emily could speak in full sentences, I'm sure that's what she would have said to me today. This was week 2 of swimming lessons for both of the kids. When I registered Kyle for his group lesson, I figured I should sign Emily up for the parents and tots course at the same time because I thought she would go stir crazy watching Kyle from the sidelines and would constantly want to be in the water too. Well, boy was I wrong! Last week, I went in with her and she literally screamed at the top of her lungs, cried and clung to my side for almost the whole half hour. It was pretty embarassing but I was determined not to give up. As I've mentioned before in my list of 25 things, I did not learn to swim until I was 18 because I was afraid of the water. And I always told myself that when I had kids, they would learn to swim at a young age so that they did not have that same fear. So, even though she is obviously scared, I would rather she get over it now. And the swimming instructor thought I should keep bringing her back so that she gets more comfortable in the water. She absolutely loves having baths and she floats on her back and everything, but I guess the deeper water is just scary right now.

So, today, I wasn't sure what to expect. All was well at first, but as soon as we reached the shower area in the change room, Emily refused to walk and I had to carry her out to the pool. When we got in the water, she again started crying and screaming a bit, but not as bad as last week. I'm sure the other parents were thinking, "would you just get her outta here, lady!" Then I took her over to the ball slide and we played some games with the group and I could tell she was having fun. She still refused to walk in the shallow water and she was still clingy at times, but I think it will get better each week. It's funny because Emily is usually pretty daring and fearless, but not when it comes to swimming. Kyle on the other hand, is usually more cautious, but his instructor says he's doing great and he seems to be loving it.

Yesterday, we had our families and friends over for Emily's birthday party. We had originally been planning a BBQ in our fire pit, but the forecast was calling for rain so we ended up deciding to do chicken and sandwiches and salads inside. After all was said and done, the rain didn't come, but it was darned cold, so everyone (about 40 people) pretty much stayed inside. Regardless, it was still fun but I was wiped at the end of the day. Actually, the last few days, I've been feeling unusually tired to the point where I had to have a nap this afternoon. I think it's been because of the late nights of school work and cleaning that I've spent over the past week. Time to get back into a good sleeping pattern!

Birthday Fun

Yesterday, we celebrated Emily's 2nd birthday. I can't believe she's already 2!! Kyle also had t-ball last night, so we did the cake and presents after that meaning that the kids got a good dose of sugar right before bed. Luckily, they settled down easily and had no problems falling asleep.

Everytime my kids' b-days come up, it gets me thinking about when they were born and how I felt the first time I saw them. So, for fun, I went back and looked at Emily's birth shots. She was a tiny 5lbs 8oz at birth and now she's this big toddler! Just so you can see the difference for yourselves, here is a picture of me holding her when she was just born. I know I look pretty rough, but it's the best way to give you an idea of just how little she was:


Now, here she is a "big girl" at 2.



You'll probably notice the swollen left eye which is due to a bug bite she got. The same thing happened at least twice last Summer and the doctor said the only thing we should do is give her some Benadryl to reduce the swelling. She woke up this morning with the eye completely shut, poor thing!

This weekend, we are having both families over for a big birthday party which should be fun. Her grandma is making her a Wiggles cake which she will love since she often watches it on TV. We got her a Wiggles DVD and when she opened it yesterday, she was all smiles. BTW, do any of you moms out there know of a cure for getting Wiggles songs out of your head? I swear, the songs "Dorothy the Dinosaur", "Big Red Car", and "Captain Feathersword" are stuck in my head for a good part of many days!

All is well on the workout front. I had a good 4K run today, but boy was it hot! I think it was around 23 degrees Celsius when I left, but I was determined not to let the heat be an excuse. I've been noticing lately that the scale is being my friend and showing my bodyfat to be around 27-28% which is lower than it's been in a long time. My first thought was that maybe the scale is broken! Or, maybe what I'm doing is actually working: Wahoo!

I too have been tagged.....

Diana tagged me, so here goes:

I am: strong willed and determined

I want: to be finished with school once and for all

I hate: being stuck in rush hour traffic

I miss: being able to sleep in

I fear: not doing well on my upcoming prospectus defense

I hear: a donut hole in the box beside me calling my name. I am trying to ignore it!

I wonder: why my dad doesn't keep in touch

I regret: not being more active in sports when I was a kid

I am not: a very good swimmer

I dance: with my son and daughter

I sing: in the car on my way to work

I cry: when my kids do something that makes me really proud

I am not always: sure of whether or not I want to have a third child

I make with my hands: a mean batch of chocolate chip cookies

I write: in this blog

I confuse: myself the more I try to think of an answer to this one!

I need: to buy some new Summer clothes

I should: go put the laundry in the dryer

I start: every morning with egg whites and a bowl of oatmeal with raisins

I finish: almost everything I start

That was fun! I tag Kristina